My art and mental health are entwined

I started my art journey that led to AndyKnillArt etc in 2015. It was my mindful exercise to take my mind off school and work. In the journey of my life since 2015 that link has been one of positive support for my mental health.

However, I go through points where I feel a need to justify myself or my art or…??? But I find myself threatening my mental health by trying to stretch the art into something else which I am ultimately not comfortable with.

I had been invited and accepted to lead a workshop for a local art group later this month. Each time I have been asked previously (2 x) for a similar activity I have declined or declined soon after accepting provisionally. Today, three weeks ahead I find myself declining and withdrawing again. I am NOT comfortable standing and leading any adult group as some sort of artist with practice to follow. It scares the living daylights out of me what expectations may be linked to being paid a fee for such an activity. I have developed my art through some seeking examples of techniques in books or online but principally from self taught practice and repetition. Doing a sketching sequence with 7/8 and 8/9 year olds works for me and I have developed some sessions I have delivered three times in a local primary school. TodayI also turned down an citation to lead an art session for 2 to 4 years.do as I cannot see how to do such a thing.

My art has two purposes:

1) for me to enjoy drawing (admittedly I then risk putting it up for sale)

2) offering others the chance to use my art pens to enjoy drawing through my art for fun activity

I need to keep reminding myself of this if asked to do anything different because those are what I can do and what I enjoy and feel comfortable with. I am not an art teacher.

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